I’m so sorry

So I suffer from serious depression and anxiety due to being brought up in a home that nurtured those feelings instead of feelings of happiness. My girlfriend of two and a half years graduated recently and while at her graduation weekend I made a big mistake. Unfortunately dealing with my feelings and thoughts sometimes causes me to get in a different mood, a mood that has a temper, is irrational, and impatient. While feeling these things I brought my girlfriend, her family, and her friend into the mess while trying to deal with my rampant thoughts. And while I have apologized to no end, and am doing things now to help my mental health, I cannot help but feel the giant pit in my stomach as I still feel so bad for ruining a moment as special as this for my girlfriend.

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2 Comments on "I’m so sorry"

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ann

You can let that feeling in the pit of your stomach go!  You are taking steps to learn new tools and you have apologized.  You do NOT have to feel guilty on top of that.  Or maybe you are afraid that your girlfriends of 2.5 years is going to reject you.  She knows the other parts of you and cares for you so maybe things are a bit funny but they will heal over.

Have you talked with her about this feeling in the pit of your stomach?  Having some discussions about how you handle situations AND how she handles situations could actually bring you closer together.

I hope you are working with a trained person who can help you sort your feelings and can share different ways to change your habaits/responses etc.

You are actually on a great track!  Stay on it.  Let us all know what you learn so we can learn too.

 




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BeyondTheSurface

There is beauty in all our actions which we seem to repeatedly hold a cloud of guilt over our heads. The fact that you are able to acknowledge that your actions on your girlfriend’s graduation towards her, and her family were inappropriate, is a start. Seriously, good for you, it’s wonderful to hear that you are aware of your behavior. We are all FLAWED, but with the right tools we can work through the symptoms that come along with depression, and anxiety. If there’s one suggestion, I could make would be to write down whatever crosses your mind in times like this one. If walking around with a journal makes you uncomfortable, use your phone and make note of how your feeling, when, and what occurred at the moment in which you started feeling these emotions come on.

In regards to your girlfriend, communication and honesty is key. If she truly understands the impact your depression, and anxiety have on you this will all be worked through. Make sure to include her in the process. The one question you need to ask yourself is ” Have I been honest with myself enough to make a change?” “Have I been honest with my loved ones on the impact and severity of my depression and anxiety?” Create yourself a toolbox that will help alleviate your symptoms when your faced with all these unwanted thoughts, and moods. Look into WRAP on google/ YouTube, it may be a stepping stone in harnessing and taking charge of these unpleasant thoughts and feelings.

    

Wishing you the best, hope this helps!




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