There’s no time

I was doing so good, moving to university and living away from home – I even made friends!! And now this, THIS. I don’t even know what has been there before, the depression or the stress?! How can a few months make such a difference? I hate hate hate it, or myself… or both. I feel like I’m dying when I get out of bed to do stuff – if i can manage. And just as bad when I can’t get up out of bed. How is this fair? Is this some kind of sick punishment? Fucking depression is gonna be the death of me. But then again I don’t even have the time to be depressed, or to die. There’s so many things I have to work at, I’m pretty sure I’d get resuscitated just so my team mates can kill me for dying in the midst of the season.
I have no time. For nothing. Except that depression does not care about schedules and it’s killing me.

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Depression that awful heavy wet blanket. ..

Speaking from experience -talking here at -_-, talking with the people around you who are also suffering and talking with professionals will get you the tools you need to get rid of depression.

Depression feels like a unfair punishment. But it isn’t. It just is. AND it is something that can be changed. YOU can learn how to think differently, to cope, to grow.

Get some books from the library., read up on it. Talk with a coach, parent. Speak it out loud, don’t be afraid to say “I suffer from depression” You will be amazed how many people will say- “whoa so do I”. It will have less power over you…

Do what you can to lessen your schedule and be sue to get at least 8 hours of sleep. Fatigue is fertile ground for depression. Look at your diet too. Wean yourself from caffeine, alcohol, sugar. They aggravate the mind, make it harder to think…Drink lots of water, eat protein etc. A body that is functioning at its best gives you a real leg up to deal with it all.

And please don’t hate yourself. This isn’t your fault. Be gentle with yourself. Take care of yourself.

You obviously have strength and stamina. Focus it on healing. MAKE time to heal the depression. If you had a broken leg you would seek medical help, rest, give it time, do physical therapy. Same with depression….